How to Build Trust in a Marriage

We expect trust to grow automatically in our marriages without making any conscious effort...

Marriage
March 21, 2025

We expect trust to grow automatically in our marriages without making any conscious effort, but you require several active ingredients to build trust in a marriage. One of the fantastic ways to build trust in your marriage is to prioritize a connection with your partner, enabling you to keep track of the other’s changing thought processes while spending time together.Also, you can encourage your partner’s trust in you by maintaining honesty in every aspect of your marriage, even when there may be harmful emotional consequences when you are honest.Another core component of building trust is being respectful to your partner through your choice of words, tone of words, approach to conversations, consideration for their feelings, and support for their interests.You can equally build trust with your partner by admitting your faults and saying sorry whenever you err because being able to accept your wrongs indicates you value the marriage above being right.

You can use these ingredients to build trust in a marriage:

Prioritize a Connection

From the dating stage to the settled stage, there’s usually a difference in the level of connection between partners, with them being oblivious to the fact that connection is a sure way to build trust in a marriage.If you want to prioritize the connection with your partner, you can appreciate their good deeds, ensuring increased relationship satisfaction, emotional support, better intimacy, and improved relationship commitment. You can also prioritize them by noticing the small details in their life, including their friends, fashion changes, and goals, allowing you to show you value their concerns.Similarly, if you create a balance in your work life and put aside work when you get home, you can put your partner first.To prevent you from getting distracted from your partner, you can imagine the future to realize how important your partner is since they will be the only one left with you after your parents and kids go.

Maintain Honesty

Constantly upholding the tenet of honesty is a crucial way to build trust in a marriage because it grants each partner security in the other’s words. In your marriage, ensure that honesty is treated as an essential value to practice mutually to prevent a feeling of excessive vulnerability in the honest partner where they are the only open one.Honesty also demands that you avoid white lines and petty justifications for keeping the truth from them, with the understanding that attempting to hide the fact because you don’t want to hurt them is still dishonest.When you are honest to your partner, try to be kind and not mistake bluntness for honesty, keeping in mind that your insensitive words may hurt your partner and damage their trust in you.You can equally consider the timing of your honest words or evaluation before you share them with your partner because they may not be in a good emotional or relaxed physical state to listen.

Speak Truth spelled out with scrabble letters

Be Respectful

Possessing respect and acting on that respect for a partner can help build trust in a marriage because it means you are satisfied with their different opinions and views.Being respectful means that you are mindful of how you communicate even when you disagree with them, understanding that validating their feelings is necessary for respect and trust to blossom.To show respect, you can also ensure you stay accountable and reliable in your dealings with your partner to preserve their mental energy and time instead of doubting your every promise.Not constantly texting your partner or snooping through their chat applications is another means of respecting them because it shows that you trust their fidelity.Ultimately, the most significant measure of respect is when you appreciate the differences between you and desist from coercing them to take your views; differences make a marriage beautiful by giving you access to another perspective.

Admit Your Wrongs

Becoming defensive or justifying mistakes is sure to create emotional barriers in a relationship; thus, it’s essential to admit wrongs to a partner to build trust in a marriage.When you make a mistake, tell the truth, assume responsibility, and try to avoid blaming someone else, hiding the error, or pretending it never happened.After telling the truth, accept the consequences of the mistake and understand that the error may upset your partner, but the mistake's admittance can help defuse the situation.Then you can try to fix the mistake by doing what it may take to correct it and ensure you learn from it because even if you can’t change the past, you can surely avoid such mistakes in the future.

Once you correct the mistake, pick a great time to apologize to your partner with sincerity in your heart and a realization that they may not get over it quickly.

A white wall with the words come together in black

Be an Emotional Safe Zone

Creating an emotional safe zone is essential for the growth of love, openness, and good mental health; therefore, it can help partners build trust in a marriage. An excellent way to start is by being an active listener, which you can easily do by asking them questions during a conversation and summarizing what they have said.You can equally pay attention to your non-verbal cues because your partner can subconsciously interpret your body language to know if you are offering emotional safety.You can also try to avoid judging your partner and instead give them the benefit of the doubt, look at what they did with understanding and compassion, and be curious about the reason for their action.Relationship therapy may also help you create a safe emotional zone because introducing an expert can help you work together to develop great ways to build emotional safety.

Conclusion

As tricky as trust can be, it’s relatively easy to build it with your partner, considering the unique feelings between both of you.If you perceive a lack of trust or desire to deepen the trust in your marriage, try to prioritize a connection with your partner, maintain honesty with them always, give them respect, admit your mistakes, and be their emotional safe zone.

Resources

https://www.marriage.com/advice/marriage-fitness/ways-to-prioritize-your-spouse/

http://www.markmerrill.com/6-ways-to-nurture-honesty-in-your-marriage/

https://www.teenhealthcare.org/blog/6-ways-to-show-respect-in-your-relationship/

https://www.liveabout.com/you-are-wrong-make-things-right-2303309

https://psychcentral.com/blog/how-do-you-create-emotional-safety-in-your-relationships#takeaway

https://www.fatherly.com/love-money/what-building-trust-in-a-marriage-really-requires/

Author
Jennifer Luttman, LPC, ACS

I am a Licensed Professional Counselor, and owner of Overcomers Counseling. I'm dedicated to helping individuals find strength and healing through life’s challenges. With a deep understanding of mental health and years of professional experience, I specialize in fostering hope and resilience while equipping her clients with tools to thrive. Passionate about empowering others, she creates a safe, supportive space where everyone feels seen, valued, and capable of overcoming obstacles on their path to well-being.

Common Questions about Marriage

How Do I Communicate My Concerns?

When you're talking to your husband about codependency, it's important to: avoid judgment or criticism, focus on the behavior, not the person, express your concern and explain how the behavior is affecting you, and offer your support and encouragement.

What can happen if we don't seek help for our relationship issues?

Ignoring relationship issues can exacerbate problems and make them more challenging to manage over time. This can result in a negative impact on your emotional well-being, increased conflict, and potential dissolution of the relationship.

Can couples counseling help if only one partner is willing to participate?

While it is ideal for both partners to actively engage in couples counseling, therapy can still be helpful if only one partner is willing to attend. In such cases, the participating partner can learn valuable skills and strategies to improve communication, manage conflicts, and create a more positive relationship dynamic, which may eventually encourage the other partner to join the process.

What are some signs that my relationship is not emotionally healthy?

There are a few key signs that may indicate that your relationship is not as emotionally healthy as it could be. First, do you or your partner feel like you have to walk on eggshells to avoid conflict? Do you find yourself withholding information or emotions to keep the peace? Do you ever feel like your partner is trying to control or manipulate you? If you answered "yes" to any of these questions, then it's possible that your relationship could be improved.

What are some practical strategies for managing relationship anxiety?

Some practical strategies for managing relationship anxiety include practicing self-compassion and self-care, setting healthy boundaries, getting enough sleep, engaging in activities that bring you joy, and seeking support from a therapist or counselor.

How can mindfulness help me overcome overthinking?

Mindfulness is the practice of being present in the moment and focusing on what's happening right now. When we're caught up in overthinking, our minds are often stuck ruminating on the past or worrying about the future. Practicing mindfulness techniques like meditation or deep breathing exercises can help bring us back into the present moment and reduce feelings of anxiety and stress.