Personality Disorder - Narcissist or Histrionic?

Personality disorders receive a lot of attention, usually not in a good way. Most commonly we hear about Narcissistic Personality Disorder. I'm certain that...

I am a Licensed Professional Counselor and owner of Overcomers Counseling. I'm dedicated to helping individuals find strength and healing through life’s challenges.

Personality disorders receive a lot of attention, usually not in a good way. Most commonly we hear about Narcissistic Personality Disorder. I'm certain that almost everyone could point out a number of Narcissistic Personality Disorder characteristics, but sometimes it gets confused with a personality disorder that is much less often talked about- Histrionic Personality Disorder. It certainly doesn't have as catchy a title as narcissism, but they have multiple similarities. So, how you do tell the difference, and what even is Histrionic Personality Disorder? First, it's good to have an understanding of what constitutes a personality disorder in general.

Personality Disorders

A personality disorder is a category of mental disorders that covers multiple different diagnoses. Narcissism, Histrionic, Paranoid, Borderline... these are all types of personality disorders because they all share specific characteristics.

What are these commonalities?

1) It's an enduring pattern of inner experience/ behavior that is very different from the person's culture  

2) It's stable over time

3) It's pervasive across many types of interactions and is inflexible

4) It begins in adolescence or early adulthood

The criteria are very important because like nearly every diagnosis almost everyone experiences similar symptoms once in a while, so being extra attentive to the idea that personality disorders are enduring, pervasive, and inflexible is very important.

Can You Spot the Difference?

I'm going to list some traits and I want you to guess what disorder those traits belong to.

Ready?

1) Enjoys being the center of attention

2) Exaggerates how close they are with select people

3) Will manipulate others to get what they want

Any guesses?

The truth is these traits belong to both Narcissistic and Histrionic Personality Disorders. This is why it can be difficult to figure out which one is which and why focusing on the similarities can lead to a major misdiagnosis. IMPORTANT: Everyone exhibits these traits from time to time which is why it's so important to remember the defining features listed above: it is stable over years and years, is it pervasive across all types of encounters and interactions, and is it always inflexible. So, if the expression is that similar, that is if how the person acts looks the same from the outside, how do you tell the difference?

Description of Histrionic Personality Disorder

Motivation

The most important aspect of telling the difference when the outward expressions are very similar is looking at the internal motivation. Asking the question, "why?" is often the only way to know the difference between Narcissistic and Histrionic Personality Disorder. The primary motivation for Narcissists is validation that they are superior. Looking at the traits listed above, each of those is motivated by the desire to be seen as more important and better than anyone else around. The attention they seek is for their superior accomplishments or abilities; the people they are "close" with are recognized as skilled, powerful, or otherwise well-respected; manipulation is used to achieve this feeling of superiority. Histrionic Personality Disorder, however, is motivated purely by receiving attention. Attention for attention's sake- whether it's in a positive light or not the main goal is to have everyone's eyes and ears on them. This is often achieved by dressing or acting sexually provocatively and using physical appearance to draw attention. The expression of emotion is likewise to get attention; quick changes in overly dramatic or theatrical expression. Lastly, they are highly suggestible and will quickly swap emotional states depending on who is around or what is happening in order to maintain the attention of others.

Conclusion

We have now covered what constitutes a personality disorder: stable over time, pervasive, and inflexible. We have dissected the similarity between two often conflated personality disorders, Narcissistic and Histrionic. And, we have assessed how to tell the difference: Narcissists are motivated by superiority over others, and Histrionics are motivated to have as much attention as possible. Personality disorders can be very difficult to deal with and constitute a heavy weight for loved ones. Understanding what personality disorders are and being able to tell the difference can make positive change and growth a real possibility. As ALWAYS, this is not an exhaustive description of either disorder and is NOT intended for diagnostic purposes. All information provided is to inform and provide insight into the nuances of mental health disorders and provide a starting place to understand how motivations in behavior are often as important (and in some cases more important) than the behavior itself.

Disclaimer: This article is for general educational purposes and isn't a substitute for personalized clinical care.

I am a Licensed Professional Counselor and owner of Overcomers Counseling. I'm dedicated to helping individuals find strength and healing through life’s challenges.

FAQs

FAQs about Narcissistic Personality

Narcissistic women often exhibit traits such as extreme confidence, dramatic emotional behavior, and a grandiose sense of self-importance. They are overly concerned with their physical appearance and social status and may have a fragile ego that requires constant validation (narcissistic supply). They can also be very self-centered and lack empathy for others.

While both male and female narcissists exhibit similar traits like a sense of entitlement, lack of empathy and need for admiration, there can be differences. Female narcissists, for instance, might use their relationships with other women to bolster their self-esteem or manipulate for personal gain. Male narcissists, on the other hand, may be more prone to showcase their narcissism through their professional achievements or financial success.

Narcissistic mothers may struggle with parenthood as their self-centered nature can interfere with their ability to put their children's needs first. Often, they view their children as extensions of themselves and can be overly concerned with their children's achievements as a reflection of their own worth.

Having a relationship with a narcissistic woman can be challenging due to their self-centered behaviors and lack of empathy. However, understanding the nature of the disorder and setting boundaries can help manage the relationship. It's also recommended to seek professional mental health support if needed.

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