How to Approach Someone You Like in a Healthy Way

Approaching someone you like can feel like rocket science, especially if you're a guy sitting there trying to muster the courage...

Life Transitions
June 5, 2025

Approaching someone you like can feel like rocket science, especially if you're a guy sitting there trying to muster the courage.The journey to love is an imperfect path filled with trial and error, often leading to cringe-inducing moments.I know it's not fun to think about, but this process is crucial for building real connections.Here are some universal themes that work as good reminders, as well as some steps I wish I had known before taking that first step.

1). Be Authentic

Being yourself is the cornerstone of any genuine relationship.

  • Authenticity builds trust and shows confidence.
  • Pretending to be someone else will only lead to superficial connections.
  • Focus on showing your true personality and interests.

2). Read Body Language

Non-verbal cues can tell you a lot about how the other person feels.

  • Look for signs of interest such as maintaining eye contact or open posture.
  • If they seem distracted, it might not be the best time for a real conversation.
  • Mirror their body language subtly to create a sense of connection.

Examples of Body Language


  • Maintaining eye contact - Shows interest and confidence in the conversation
  • Open posture (e.g., uncrossed arms, relaxed stance) - Indicates receptiveness and comfort
  • Leaning slightly forward - Demonstrates engagement and attentiveness to what is being said
  • Smiling naturally - Conveys friendliness and makes the other person feel good
  • Mirroring (subtly copying the other person's movements) - Creates a sense of shared interest and rapport
  • Nodding along - Indicates active listening and agreement with what has been said
  • Tilting the head slightly - Shows curiosity and interest in the conversation
  • Relaxed hands and gestures - Communicates ease and openness in the interaction
  • Glancing away occasionally - Signals thoughtfulness and gives space for natural pauses
  • Standing or sitting at an appropriate distance - Respects personal space, making the other person feel comfortable

people laughing together outside

4). Start with a Casual Greeting

A simple approach can break the ice effectively.

  • Begin with a friendly "Hi" and a warm smile.
  • Introduce yourself if you haven't met before.
  • Keeping it casual makes the other person feel at ease.

a latte on a coffee table

5). Show Genuine Interest

Engage in a way that shows you care about what they have to say.

  • Ask open-ended questions about their hobbies or day to encourage conversation.
  • Listen actively and provide thoughtful responses.
  • Compliment something specific about them to show attention to detail.

3). Read the Room

The setting plays a significant role in how the interaction unfolds.

  • Choose a relaxed environment where both of you can feel comfortable.
  • Avoid approaching during stressful situations or when they're clearly busy.
  • Ensure the setting allows for more conversations without too many interruptions.

6). Recognize Their Nervousness

Understand that they might be just as nervous as you are.

  • If they seem uneasy, use light humor or shared interests to ease tension.
  • Give them space if needed and be patient.
  • Your calm demeanor can help boost both your self esteem and theirs.

7). Know When to Take a Break

Not every approach will turn into something more, and that's okay.

  • Respect their boundaries and signals if they're not interested.
  • Politely exit the conversation if it's not going well.
  • Remember that rejection is part of the process and doesn't define your worth.

What I Wish I Knew When I Approached Someone the First Time

Approaching someone you like can be nerve-wracking, but it's an important process in developing meaningful relationships.You may be talking to a potential partner or looking for good friends, being yourself and showing genuine interest are key.Real conversations stem from understanding body language and reading the room. Keep in mind that most people are just as nervous, and the more you practice, the easier it will become to approach others confidently.Focus on making connections rather than impressing, and you'll find the process much more rewarding.

Conclusion

At Overcomers Counseling, we offer comprehensive support including life coaching, coping strategies, and advice on how to build interpersonal relationships.Whether you're looking to enhance your friendships, easily approach new connections, or navigate the complexities of becoming someone's best friend, we provide the tools and guidance you need.With a focus on every stage of personal development, our services aim to bring fun and hope into your journey.Life coaching in Colorado Springs can help you set a positive course for what lies ahead. No matter what challenges you face, Overcomers Counseling can offer the answers and examples you need to make meaningful changes.Visit our page about life coaching in Colorado Springs to learn more about how we can support you in building a brighter future.

Author
Jennifer Luttman, LPC, ACS

I am a Licensed Professional Counselor, and owner of Overcomers Counseling. I'm dedicated to helping individuals find strength and healing through life’s challenges. With a deep understanding of mental health and years of professional experience, I specialize in fostering hope and resilience while equipping her clients with tools to thrive. Passionate about empowering others, she creates a safe, supportive space where everyone feels seen, valued, and capable of overcoming obstacles on their path to well-being.

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