Why You Should Appreciate Your Partner

Making efforts to enhance the strength of a relationship and build its emotional bond can lead to resentment if the efforts are unappreciated. It's...

Marriage
June 26, 2025

Making efforts to enhance the strength of a relationship and build its emotional bond can lead to resentment if the efforts are unappreciated. It's essential that you appreciate your partner for the positive things they do and for their presence in your life.When you appreciate them, it makes them feel good about their positive deeds. Your praises and thanks will boost their moods and give them beaming smiles. The compliments may also lead to more positive acts from them because of the great feelings they know are awaiting them.Equally, praising them also makes you feel good. Since humans generally feel great when helping others feel good, it becomes a win-win situation for the parties involved. If your spouse is happy because of your praises, you will also become happy because you know you put them in a good mood.Furthermore, doling out praises to your partner will train your mind to look for positives in your partner. When you become used to thanking them for their good deeds and making both of you happy, you may become addicted to ensure the repeat of such situations.You can continue reading to learn why you should appreciate your partner:

It Makes Them Feel Good

Giving praise for a person's actions can help them see how much you value their actions.They will understand that their acts were good enough for you to praise them, and this will make them happy in return.When you appreciate your partner for their deeds and they feel good, you are creating an opportunity for you to live a long life. A positive relationship constantly emits good feelings, allowing the partners to live healthily and without marital troubles.Making your partner feel good also helps to reduce their blood pressure level. Since they are receiving mood-boosting accolades, they will have no reason to dwell on negative emotions that can cause blood pressure spikes.Your appreciation can also increase your partner's heart health. By making them smile, you are making their brain release norepinephrine, dopamine, and adrenaline. These chemicals will give their heart a workout as they make it beat faster.

It Makes You Look for Positives

Getting grateful enough to appreciate your partner in the ways they like will have you learning to look for positives in no time. When you already know that praising them results in them feeling good and doing more good, you will get used to looking for the positive thing in all their actions to repeat the appreciation process.As you get used to seeing positives, you will learn that it helps with stress relief. Given that your ability to see the silver lining in every situation will translate into other aspects of life besides your marriage, you will be able to maneuver around difficulties instead of getting stressed over them.Similarly, your positive thinking will help you with improved wellness and a stronger immune system. This can happen because your regularly happy state will ensure your body's chemicals are in optimal condition. You will also be in a great mental space to exercise and eat healthily.Equally, you can also build your mental resilience with the positive thinking you have created from seeing the good in your partner.Whenever you are in any form of life struggle, your optimism will help you react to it positively and figure out a solution.

It Makes You Feel Good

Being nice to other people generally makes us feel good about ourselves for being great people that can make others happy. So, when you appreciate your partner and they feel good, you are also likely to feel great because you made them happy.Your personal happiness may stem from a contagious form of joy, which occurs because of the proximity to a happy person. If your partner is happy beside you and you are not feeling any negative emotions, you are likely to be infected by their happiness and feel happy.You may also feel good because you know deep within you that your praises will lead to more connection between both of you.Compliments are an excellent way to cement your presence in your partner's life, and you will continue getting closer the more you praise them.Also, we generally think of ourselves as nice people; thus, when we get the chance to be recognized as kind people, it will trigger a sense of fulfillment. When you feel good after appreciating your partner, it may be due to the validation of your "nice person" status.

It Makes Them Reciprocate

The principle of reciprocity is central in almost every facet of marriage. This is expected because marriage takes two to tango.Therefore, it's equally likely that when you appreciate your partner for their good deeds, they will also appreciate you when you do some good deeds.The reciprocity is excellent because it will let the relationship move stronger and get more solid.In a relationship without reciprocity, you may build resentment toward your partner if they don't appreciate your efforts. You may start to believe that your efforts are never good enough for them.Also, reciprocity is excellent because it shows that both of you care about your marriage, and it's not just you who desires a blissful marriage. When you praise them for their effort in the morning and they consciously praise you in return, even when your effort is small, you'll know they care about you.If you notice that they aren't reciprocating your appreciation despite doing more good deeds, you can begin a conversation about it. They are likely not doing it with a bad intention. You bringing it up will let them realize and change to be better.

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It Lets Them Know What You Like

Understanding a person's needs can open up new ways of making efforts in the relationship. When you appreciate your partner, your appreciation will be made for certain acts, enabling them to know your likes and how to satisfy you.There will be a greater connection in your marriage since they understand what you like and relate to your interests.For example, if you appreciate them for working out with you, they will realize its importance to you and may build up a liking for exercise to connect better with you.Also, there are likely to be fewer problems when they understand what you like.Since they know your needs, they won't deviate and do things you don't like.With your needs evident to them, there will be increased communication in the marriage since they can easily talk to you better. For example, a partner you appreciate for saving a movie will understand you like such films, resulting in further communication over related topics.

Conclusion

Sometimes, people may stop appreciating their companions because they take their efforts for granted. However, when you read through the benefits of appreciating them, you realize that you should appreciate your partner more.These benefits include making both of you feel good, training you to look for positives, making them reciprocate, and letting them realize what you like.

Resources

https://healthcare.utah.edu/healthfeed/postings/2017/02/relationships.php

https://www.verywellmind.com/benefits-of-positive-thinking-2794767

https://www.lifehack.org/articles/communication/why-you-should-appreciate-your-mate.html

https://www.bethbashore.com/single-post/2015/05/24/five-benefits-of-expressing-appreciation-to-your-partner

https://theconversation.com/amp/five-reasons-why-being-kind-makes-you-feel-good-according-to-science-92459

https://www.business2community.com/b2b-marketing/why-reciprocation-is-key-to-building-business-relationships-0353558

https://blog.heartmanity.com/why-knowing-your-partners-love-language-can-strengthen-your-bond?hs_amp=true

Author
Jennifer Luttman, LPC, ACS

I am a Licensed Professional Counselor, and owner of Overcomers Counseling. I'm dedicated to helping individuals find strength and healing through life’s challenges. With a deep understanding of mental health and years of professional experience, I specialize in fostering hope and resilience while equipping her clients with tools to thrive. Passionate about empowering others, she creates a safe, supportive space where everyone feels seen, valued, and capable of overcoming obstacles on their path to well-being.

Common Questions about Marriage

Is couples counseling only for couples in crisis or experiencing severe issues?

No, couples counseling can be beneficial for couples at any stage of their relationship and with varying levels of difficulties. Even couples who have a strong foundation can benefit from counseling to enhance communication, deepen emotional connection, or navigate life transitions. Seeking professional guidance early on can prevent minor issues from escalating into more significant problems.

What if my spouse refuses to get help?

If your spouse is resistant to treatment, you might need to get help from a professional. An interventionist can work with you and your family to plan a confrontation that will encourage your spouse to seek help.

Can love be rekindled in a marriage?

Yes, love can be rekindled in a marriage. It takes effort and commitment, but it's not impossible. By prioritizing communication, quality time, and showing appreciation and gratitude, it is possible to reignite the spark in your marriage.

How long does couples counseling typically take?

Couples counseling timelines can vary depending on the issues specifically being addressed to you and your partner, and the kind of progress that is being made in counseling or therapy. Our therapists will regularly assess your progress and adjust your treatment plan as needed.

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There are many different signs of codependency, but some common ones include: feeling responsible for your partner's happiness or well-being, enabling your partner's bad behavior, feeling like you can't function without your partner, and being overly dependent on your partner.

How Do I Communicate My Concerns?

When you're talking to your husband about codependency, it's important to: avoid judgment or criticism, focus on the behavior, not the person, express your concern and explain how the behavior is affecting you, and offer your support and encouragement.