Tips on How to Handle Money in Your Marriage

Money being the root of all evil may just be a misguided saying. But if thoroughly examined, the statement may be given some credence based on how many...

Marriage
June 26, 2025

Money being the root of all evil may just be a misguided saying. But if thoroughly examined, the statement may be given some credence based on how many marriages have failed because of money.Thus, you may need to learn how to handle money in your marriage if you desire peace and a long-lasting relationshipOne method of handling money well in a marriage is to ensure the openness of purchases between you and your partner.Hiding things from them can be seen as financial infidelity and may lead to a lack of trust. If you can stay open about your finances like every other thing, the trust in the marriage will continue to grow.Equally, you may also try to identify your personality differences regarding money habits. One of you may be very calculative, while the other is less concerned about the money flow.Once you understand your different personalities, you will be able to learn how to compromise financially for a better marriage.Furthermore, you can operate a joint account for your income and expenses. It may make sense pre-marriage to have separate accounts because you are not yet "one."However, since marriage effectively makes you "one," it will be great to bank together for easy accountability and handling of the funds. You can consider these tips on how to handle money in your marriage:

Be Conscious of Your Kids' Wants

Generally, kids know nothing about how to get money.They are simply focused on how to get things they like, from pizza to toys and vacations, sometimes leading to arguments between partners over satisfying the child or saving money. Therefore, if you want to handle money in your marriage correctly, you should try to be conscious of your kids' wants. Rather than buying everything your kid desires instantly, you can discuss it with your partner to help you get an opinion based on an objective view of your finances and the importance of your child's wants. Also, you can engage your kids in an educational lecture about wants and needs. This will let them know how to prioritize their needs and the appropriate times when they may get their desires. The lecture will also enable your kids to understand that they should not be sad if they can't get their wants satisfied.To take the child's education further, you may also start making your child work for their money. You can pay them to complete certain household chores or run errands for you.If you have a business and they help in its running, you may also consider paying them for their services.

Be Open With Your Purchases

You may consider keeping mute about your purchases omissions that you shouldn't feel guilty for since you aren't lying consciously.However, if you want to handle money in your marriage like a pro, it's better to be open about your purchases to enable the relationship to enjoy financial trust.Being open with your finances is an indication that you are honest with your partner in the marriage. With money being a sensitive issue in every relationship, an honest outlook on money is excellent.Always remember that you and your partner are a team, so if you have thoughts of hiding your purchases from them, you should erase them. You are now "one," and since you shouldn't lie to yourself, you should avoid lying to your partner, even if it's by omission.If you make a wrong purchase, rather than hiding it from them because you fear them frowning at you, remember that you would also want to hear about their bad purchases.So, schedule a time to talk about your bad purchases so you may gain their insight on what went wrong.

Identify Your Different Financial Personalities

Our personalities shape everything from our reactions to other people, choice of jobs, to financial habits. Thus, it's essential to identify your different personalities concerning money if you want to handle money in your marriage correctly.By identifying personalities, you will discover if you and your partner belong to either the saver, investor, debtor, big spender, or shopper categories.Once you can identify your respective category, both of you will better understand your financial habits. You will also start to motivate each other toward escaping the drawbacks of each type. For example, a debtor that goes into debt without thinking much about it will need the motivation to become conscious of money. Similarly, a saver who prefers not to spend any money will also need some push to become comfortable spending some money for comfort in the marriage.

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Operate a Joint Account

If you believe that a joint account is doomed to fail because it allows you to be in each other's personal financial space, you may be wrong. Marriage is all about being together, and if you want to handle money in your marriage perfectly, it will be a great idea to have a joint account.Operating a joint account allows you to constantly be on the same page with your partner. Since you can see each other's income and purchases, it becomes easy to save towards trips, investments, and trust funds since you can see your partner is saving with you. Similarly, a joint account can help you qualify for bank rewards faster than using a separate account. This is because the income and frequency of purchases from two people will go farther in bonus than a single person.Interestingly, there's no added stress in opening a joint account.It's almost the same process as opening a separate account, albeit with more details. Instead of opening a joint account from scratch, you may even upgrade an existing single account to a joint account.

Be Cool With Salary Disparity

Income gaps between partners are a common sight but can end up causing a mess in the marriage if not properly handled. Hence, if you want to reasonably handle money in your marriage, it's a great idea to be cool with your salary difference.One way of being cool about it is to have a conversation about it. Rather than avoiding the conversation because of its discomfort, it's better to have it and reassure each other that both partners will be appreciated and loved regardless of the salary disparity.You can also talk about a convenient bill splitting system in marriage. You may use an equal splitting system where you divide finances equally despite the gap.On the flip side, you may use a proportional system where you contribute based on how much you earn.And be sure to have further talks about a possible change in finances in the future.If a partner decides to go to school, the other partner automatically becomes the breadwinner. Planning for such a scenario will help the marriage easily survive it.

Conclusion

Killing marriage issues even before they come up is crucial if you want a long and fulfilled marriage. Money can be one of those issues, and it's vital that you handle money in your marriage so peace and love can reign.To handle marital finances properly, you should be conscious of your kids' wants, be open with your purchases, identify your different financial personalities, operate a joint account, and be cool with salary disparity.

Author
Jennifer Luttman, LPC, ACS

I am a Licensed Professional Counselor, and owner of Overcomers Counseling. I'm dedicated to helping individuals find strength and healing through life’s challenges. With a deep understanding of mental health and years of professional experience, I specialize in fostering hope and resilience while equipping her clients with tools to thrive. Passionate about empowering others, she creates a safe, supportive space where everyone feels seen, valued, and capable of overcoming obstacles on their path to well-being.

Common Questions about Marriage

How can I improve my communication with my spouse?

In order to improve your communication with your spouse, you need to be open to change.This means being willing to change the way you communicate, as well as the way you think about and handle conflict.It is also important to be patient when communicating with your spouse. This means taking the time to listen to what they have to say and trying to understand their point of view. Lastly, it is important to be respectful when communicating with your spouse. This means using kind words and avoiding put-downs or criticisms. When you are open to change, you can learn new ways of communicating that can improve your marriage.

How long does couples counseling typically take?

Couples counseling timelines can vary depending on the issues specifically being addressed to you and your partner, and the kind of progress that is being made in counseling or therapy. Our therapists will regularly assess your progress and adjust your treatment plan as needed.

What can we expect during our first couples counseling session?

During your first couples counseling session, your therapist will likely gather information about your relationship history, current challenges, and individual backgrounds. They may also ask about your goals for therapy and what you hope to achieve. This initial session serves as an opportunity for you and your partner to become comfortable with the therapist and begin building trust in the therapeutic process.

Is couples counseling only for couples in crisis or experiencing severe issues?

No, couples counseling can be beneficial for couples at any stage of their relationship and with varying levels of difficulties. Even couples who have a strong foundation can benefit from counseling to enhance communication, deepen emotional connection, or navigate life transitions. Seeking professional guidance early on can prevent minor issues from escalating into more significant problems.

Is it normal to fall out of love with your spouse?

It's normal for feelings to change over time. Relationships go through ups and downs, and it's common for feelings of love and passion to fluctuate.

How can I praise my child's effort without focusing on results?

Focus on your child's effort by praising specific actions they took, such as working hard or showing determination.

Avoid overly praising results or using comparisons to other children.