How to Deal With Traumatic Grief

Grief can be an overwhelming emotion, particularly when it is sudden or traumatic, leaving us feeling lost and unsure of how to move forward. This blog post...

Grief
June 26, 2025

Grief can be an overwhelming emotion, particularly when it is sudden or traumatic, leaving us feeling lost and unsure of how to move forward. 

This blog post aims to provide practical strategies and compassionate advice to help you navigate through this difficult time

We will explore various coping mechanisms, from mindfulness practices to creating personal memorials, all while emphasizing the importance of patience and self-care. 

Remember, there's no 'right' way to grieve; everyone's journey is unique. Let's begin this exploration together and find ways to heal and honor our loved ones in our ways. 

Acknowledge Your Loss

Acknowledging your loss is the first, and perhaps one of the most crucial steps, in dealing with traumatic grief. 

It's important to understand that it's okay to feel pain and sorrow, as these emotions are a natural response to loss. 

Suppressing or denying your feelings might lead to more harm than good in the long run. Allow yourself to grieve, cry, and feel the void that the loss has left. 

This is not an indication of weakness but rather a sign of your humanity and your capacity to love. 

y accepting and acknowledging your loss, you are making the first move to recovery. 

Seek Professional Help

If your grief feels too overwhelming to handle alone, it's perfectly okay and advisable to seek professional help

Therapists and counselors are trained to help you navigate through your feelings, understand your grief, and provide tools to cope with the loss. 

They can offer a safe and non-judgmental space for you to express your emotions, while also providing insight and perspective that you might not see on your own. 

Remember, seeking help is not a sign of weakness. 

Express Your Feelings

Expressing your feelings is a therapeutic way to cope with traumatic grief. 

It's crucial not to bottle up your emotions, but rather let them out through different mediums. 

This could be talking about your loss with a trusted friend or family member, writing about your feelings in a journal, or even expressing yourself through art or music. 

Articulating your emotions can bring relief and can help you understand your feelings better. 

Remember, there's no right or wrong way to express your grief. Find a method that feels comfortable for you and allows you to reflect on your loss while also honoring your emotions.

Join a Support Group

Joining a support group can be an invaluable resource when dealing with traumatic grief. 

These collectives offer an environment where you can link with individuals who are navigating through experiences akin to yours.

Sharing your feelings and hearing others' stories can help you feel less isolated and provide comfort in knowing you're not alone.

Additionally, these groups often provide practical advice and coping strategies that have worked for others. 

Support groups can be found in your local community or online, offering the flexibility to engage in a way that's most comfortable for you. 

Practice Self-Care

Practicing self-care is essential when dealing with traumatic grief. 

It's easy to neglect your own needs during this time, but it's crucial to remember that taking care of your physical and mental health can help you cope better. 

This might include maintaining a balanced diet, getting regular exercise, ensuring you get enough sleep, and taking time each day to relax and do something you enjoy. 

You could read a book, take a walk in nature, meditate, or listen to soothing music. 

Remember, it's okay to take a break from grieving and do something that brings you joy or peace.

Mindfulness and Meditation

Mindfulness and meditation can be powerful tools in managing traumatic grief. Mindfulness refers to the act of being completely attuned and involved in our current activity, devoid of any disruptions or biases. 

It's about being conscious of our thoughts and emotions but not allowing ourselves to be swept away by them. 

Meditation can help us achieve this state of mind, providing a sense of calm and balance that benefits both our emotional well-being and our overall health. 

Through these practices, you can learn to sit with your emotions without letting them overwhelm you, develop a deeper understanding of your grief, and find a peaceful space within yourself even amidst the pain. 

Remember, it's not about eliminating grief or resisting it, but rather learning to live with it, acknowledging it, and permitting yourself to feel it. 

Create a Memorial or Tribute

Creating a memorial or tribute can be a therapeutic way to cope with traumatic grief. 

This act allows you to express your feelings and celebrate the life of the person you have lost in a tangible way. 

A memorial could be anything from planting a tree, creating a photo album, writing a letter or poem, or even establishing a scholarship in their name. 

It's a personal and meaningful way to keep their memory alive, while also providing a focus for your grief. 

Not only does this offer a sense of closure, but it also serves as a symbol of your love and ongoing connection with the person who has passed.

Give Yourself Time

Giving yourself time is an integral part of the healing process when dealing with traumatic grief. 

Healing doesn't happen overnight, and it's important to remember that everyone grieves at their own pace. 

There's no set timeline for grief, and it's perfectly okay to feel your emotions deeply, no matter how long it takes. 

You might have good days and bad days, and that's completely normal. Try not to rush yourself or let others rush you through your grief. 

Be patient with yourself, allow yourself to feel, and permit yourself to heal in your own time and in your way. 

Remember, it's not about 'moving on' from the person you've lost, but rather learning to live with the loss and finding ways to keep their memory alive in your heart.

Conclusion

In conclusion, dealing with traumatic grief is a deeply personal and individual journey. 

It's important to remember that there's no right or wrong way to grieve. 

Whether it's through mindfulness and meditation, creating a memorial or tribute, or simply giving yourself time, the key is to find what works best for you. 

Surround yourself with support from loved ones or professional help if needed, and allow yourself to experience your emotions fully. 

It's not an easy process, and it takes time, but with patience and empathy, you can navigate through this difficult period and find ways to honor your loved one while also taking care of your well-being. 

Author
Jennifer Luttman, LPC, ACS

I am a Licensed Professional Counselor, and owner of Overcomers Counseling. I'm dedicated to helping individuals find strength and healing through life’s challenges. With a deep understanding of mental health and years of professional experience, I specialize in fostering hope and resilience while equipping her clients with tools to thrive. Passionate about empowering others, she creates a safe, supportive space where everyone feels seen, valued, and capable of overcoming obstacles on their path to well-being.

Common Questions about Grief

What are some signs that you're ready to move on?

Some signs that you may be ready to move on include feeling at peace with the breakup, no longer regularly thinking about your ex, and having a renewed sense of optimism. Ultimately, only you can decide when you're ready to start dating again or take other steps toward moving on.

How long does grief usually last in the elderly?

There is no "right" or "wrong" answer when it comes to how long grief will last in the elderly. For some people, the grieving process may last for several months or even years. For others, it may come in waves – they may have periods of intense grief followed by periods of relative calm. It's important to remember that everyone grieves in their own way and at their own pace.

Is there any support for family members affected by a loved one's death?

Yes, we provide supportive counseling for family members who are struggling with the loss of a loved one. Our compassionate therapists can help you gain insight into your feelings and provide constructive strategies to cope with the pain of bereavement.

What are the stages of grief?

The stages of grief, according to the Kübler-Ross model, include denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. However, it's important to note that not everyone will experience all these stages, or in this order. Grief is a highly individual process.

Why is it important to address grief?

Addressing grief is crucial because unresolved grief can significantly impact your quality of life, overall well-being, and ability to function in daily activities. Left unaddressed, grief can lead to more severe mental health issues, such as depression, anxiety, and complicated grief.

What are some things I should avoid saying to an elderly loved one who is grieving?

There are a few things you should avoid saying to someone who is grieving, as they can come across as insensitive or unhelpful. For example, don't tell them that it's "time to move on" or that they "should be over it by now." It's also best not to make any assumptions about how they're feeling or what they need – instead, ask them directly how you can help.