How to Cope with Anticipatory Grief

When you lose a loved one, the grief you experience is natural and expected.But what do you do when you know someone close to you is going to die, and death...

Grief
June 26, 2025

When you lose a loved one, the grief you experience is natural and expected.

But what do you do when you know someone close to you is going to die, and death is imminent?

This is called anticipatory grief, and it can be just as intense and debilitating as regular grief.

Here's what you need to know about anticipatory grief, including how to cope.   

What Is Anticipatory Grief?

Anticipatory grief is the sadness, anxiety, and uncertainty that comes with knowing that someone you love is going to die.

It can happen when death is expected (e.g., after a terminal diagnosis) or when death is sudden (e.g., in the case of an accident).

It's normal to feel a range of emotions when anticipating the loss of a loved one, and those emotions can be just as intense as the emotions experienced after the death itself.  

two teenagers standing next to eachother at night

How to Cope With Anticipatory Grief

There is no "right" way to grieve, and there is no timeline for grieving. So take whatever time you need to process your feelings�there is no rush.

Try to find healthy outlets for your grief. Some people find journaling helpful, while others prefer talking to friends or family members about their feelings.

Exercise can also be a great way to release some of the built-up tension and stress associated with grief.

Don't hesitate to seek professional help if you're finding it difficult to cope on your own. 

Recognize the Symptoms of Anticipatory Grief 

There are many different symptoms of anticipatory grief, and they can vary from person to person.

Some common symptoms include feeling sad or depressed, having difficulty sleeping, feeling anxious or stressed, having changes in appetite, and feeling irritable or angry.

It is important to recognize these symptoms so that you can seek help if needed.

Seek Help from a Mental Health Professional 

If you are experiencing symptoms of anticipatory grief, it is important to seek help from a mental health professional.

They can help you to understand your feelings and provide support and guidance through this difficult time.

Connect with Other People Who Are Going Through Similar Experiences 

It can be helpful to connect with other people who are going through similar experiences.

There are many online forums and support groups available for people coping with anticipatory grief.

These can be great resources for information and support.

a couple together

Take Care of Yourself 

It is important to take care of yourself both physically and emotionally when coping with anticipatory grief.

Make sure to eat healthy foods, exercise regularly, get plenty of sleep, and avoid alcohol and drugs.

It is also important to find healthy ways to express your emotions, such as through journaling or art.

Remember That It's Ok to Feel Sad 

Anticipatory grief can be very difficult to cope with, and it's ok to feel sad.

Allow yourself to process your emotions without judgment or guilt. It is important to allow yourself time and space to heal.

Remember that grief is a normal and natural response to the loss of someone you love.

By understanding anticipatory grief and how to cope with it, you can help yourself heal and move forward. 

Frequently Asked Questions about Coping with Anticipatory Grief

How can I tell if I am experiencing anticipatory grief?

There are a few signs that may indicate that you are experiencing anticipatory grief. These include feeling preoccupied with the impending loss, feeling overwhelmed by negative emotions, withdrawing from activities that you once enjoyed, and having difficulty sleeping or eating. If you are experiencing any of these signs, it may be helpful to speak with a mental health professional.

How can I cope with anticipatory grief?

There are a few things that you can do to cope with anticipatory grief. First, it is important to allow yourself to feel your emotions and express them in a healthy way. Additionally, staying connected with your support system and participating in activities that bring you joy can be helpful. Finally, it is important to make sure that you take care of yourself physically by eating well and exercising regularly.

Will anticipatory grief go away on its own?

For some people, anticipatory grief will lessen over time as they come to terms with the impending loss. However, for others, the grief may remain constant or even increase as the loss gets closer. If you find that your anticipatory grief is not improving or is causing significant distress, it may be helpful to seek professional help.

What should I do if I am struggling to cope with anticipatory grief?

If you are struggling to cope with anticipatory grief, there are a few things that you can do. First, try to reach out to your support system for help and understanding. Additionally, consider speaking with a mental health professional about how you are feeling and what coping strategies may be helpful for you. 

Overcomers Counseling is Here to Help

At Overcomers Counseling, we understand the difficulty of anticipatory grief and how overwhelming it can be. We are here to provide support and guidance as you work through your emotions. 

Our therapeutic services are tailored to meet the unique needs of each client, and our compassionate team is dedicated to helping you find healing. Contact us today for more information about how we can help.

If you or a loved one is struggling with anticipatory grief, please don't hesitate to reach out for help. Our team at Overcomers Counseling is here to provide compassionate and professional support to help you cope with your emotions and move forward. 

Conclusion

Anticipatory grief is the sadness and anxiety that comes with knowing someone you love is going to die.

It's normal to feel a range of intense emotions when anticipating the loss of a loved one, but there are things you can do to cope with your grief.

Take whatever time you need to grieve, journal your feelings, talk to friends or family members, exercise, and seek professional help if necessary.

Author

Jennifer Luttman, LPC, ACS

I am a Licensed Professional Counselor, and owner of Overcomers Counseling. I'm dedicated to helping individuals find strength and healing through life’s challenges. With a deep understanding of mental health and years of professional experience, I specialize in fostering hope and resilience while equipping her clients with tools to thrive. Passionate about empowering others, she creates a safe, supportive space where everyone feels seen, valued, and capable of overcoming obstacles on their path to well-being.

Common Questions

Questions about Grief

I don't want to ruin the holidays for my family by being sad all the time. What can I do?

It's important to remember that you are allowed to grieve however you need to, and that doesn't mean you have to ruin the holidays for everyone else. If you need to take a break from holiday festivities, do so. Go for a walk, take a nap, watch a movie—whatever you need to do to take care of yourself. You can also try talking to your family about your grief ahead of time and asking for their understanding and support.

Why is grief worse at night?

Grief may feel worse at night because sleep disturbances are common during the grieving process. As nighttime falls, distractions diminish and we're left alone with our thoughts, which can make the loss feel overwhelming.

What are some healthy ways to cope with the pain of a breakup?

There are many healthy ways to cope with the pain of a breakup. Some strategies include engaging in self-care activities, writing in a journal, reaching out to loved ones for support, and reframing your perspective. Additionally, seeking professional help can be an important step toward healing after a breakup.

The holidays were always my loved one's favorite time of year. What can I do to honor their memory?

There are many ways you can honor your loved one's memory during the holidays. You could decorate in their favorite colors, play their favorite music, make their favorite food, or even just talk about them often throughout the holiday season. You could also create a new tradition in their memory, such as planting a tree or making a donation in their name.

What are some common symptoms of grief in the elderly?

There are a variety of symptoms that can be associated with grief in the elderly. Some common physical symptoms include fatigue, changes in appetite, and difficulty sleeping. Emotional symptoms can include sadness, anger, anxiety, and guilt. It's also common for those who are grieving to withdraw from social activities and lose interest in hobbies or activities they once enjoyed.

I'm dreading the holidays because I know they will be so hard without my loved one. How can I get through them?

It is completely normal to feel dread or even fear when thinking about the upcoming holiday season. One way to ease your anxiety is by planning ahead and being prepared for how you will deal with tough moments. If there are certain events you know will be difficult, try to come up with an exit strategy beforehand so you can leave if needed. It can also be helpful to talk to a therapist or counselor before the holidays to help you manage your expectations and emotions.

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